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Blank Canvas

Painting the Indelible Picture of Life’s “Savory Delight”

Your life is an unbroken series of cycles and patterns.
Everything you do, say or feel is refurbished. One continuous
‘merry go round’ of episodes; same theme, different faces.
Irreplaceable characters who have been written into the
individual sphere of activity in your personal dramatic script
of existence. You are not, nor have you ever been, separate
from the people and events that surround you. Nor are you above
(more advanced) or below (less capable) than any of them. We
are all on the same ride! Whoever is facing you is in direct
proportion to and a perfect reflection of your present level of
consciousness. No more. No less. Your immediate level of
consciousness mirrors the true state in which your motivations
reside. No need to ask, “Why is THIS happening to me”, or “Why
did he/she do THAT to me.” Difficulty arises when you try to
conceal your obscure motivations from yourself. You end up
blaming another for your prickly unrest and bruised ego. Your
insulted personality rises in defense as you try to calm your
infuriated libido. No one has harmed, abused, cheated,
offended, or desecrated you in any way. Nor have your feelings
been damaged or corrupted. Emotions are capricious and need to
be exposed.

The fictitious idea that you have been offended, abandoned,
abused, neglected, or impaired is an obvious distortion. No
doubt, some of life’s episodes hurt the body but never injure
the soul. In fact, the soul craves each pain filled occurrence.
For it is by and through painful events that genuine truth is
gained and tabulated. Authentic certainty may be expressed as
pain temporarily, but it never cripples your inner nature. As
long as you continue to deny this instinctive reality, you will
complicate and color your life by invoking and prolonging
bitterness, regret, remorsefulness, sorrow, jealousy, envy,
revenge, and self-pity. You will end up being overly
judgmental, critical, cynical and dubious in your dealings.
Your relationships will be “double-minded and unstable in all
of their ways.”‘ Your state of over-all health and mind’s
well-being is contingent upon your NOT believing that someone
has cheated you out of ‘something or someone’, or that you have
been {in some way or another} denied something you feel you
deserve. It is imperative you realize you are creating and
living out each moment of your life exactly and precisely as
your soul sees fit for your particular pattern and cycle of
development. In other words, you needed and desired {whether
consciously aware of it or not} all of the troublesome,
heart-breaking and devastating events that have taken place.

All things transpire for reasons beyond your present
comprehension. Pain is merely one way of reflecting a dimension
of spiraling ascent. Though the plot may seem ambiguous and
mal-aligned, nothing could be further from the truth. At times,
repressed anger, unexpressed guilt, magnified denial, and
tenaciously harbored regret acts as the culprit to bring about
a desired result. It does not matter whether you are
consciously aware of these debilitating emotions; the results
are geared to the exaltation of your experience. Forgiveness is
at hand! You must let go of the misguided idea that anyone at
any time has ever WRONGED you. Every single cycle and pattern
of reoccurring blights have been necessary to bring you where
you are today and will be the exponent to carry your forward.
Call it your ‘training ground’ if you want to. Whatever works
for you, you must come to terms with {learn to truly
appreciate} the pain, disappointment and disillusionment you
have personally suffered. No clearer mirror is offered as a
reflection of your inner most requirements in character
definition.

You were born with a specialized ‘divine seed of character’
formed from a pattern of celestial origin. One, of which is
destined to grow, develop, mature, evolve through a myriad of
EXPERIENCES. These events of your life are re-cycled according
to unidentified, unspecified, unstoppable sacred instructions.
Painful events are a vital part of the deepest recess of your
productive soul. Similar, in effect, to the metamorphosis of a
butterfly: can a seemingly earth-bound caterpillar even
slightly suspect he/she (after an indescribable transformation)
will soar one day to magnanimous heights with glorious wings?
Even so, are you instilled with an enormous capability to
transcend all obstacles and barriers. In fact, inescapable
challenges are the momentous fabric woven into that which is
called your ‘flesh.’ Any trivial bit of cynical negativity or
resistance is linked to your unwillingness to resolve a
profoundly encrusted belief that you are in some way different
from all others who reside with you on the planet and in some
way deserve to be treated ‘special.’ Not true. We are all the
same. You will never be able to govern or control the thoughts,
actions, and behaviors of another. {You are not supposed to.}
But, by the release and redefinition of your own malicious,
selfish, greedy, self-serving intent, coupled with your
self-indulged need to control and manipulate the situation,
will you be freed of the ambiguity you express and project.
It’s simply a matter of clearing the table of dirty dishes so
that you can prepare the fabulous festive feast.

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Look squarely and honestly into the face of your personal life
being perfectly mirrored back at you through the faces of all
those intimately and casually involved with you. What do you
see? What are you hearing? Is there bitterness? [Sarcasm/
Regret/ Guilt?] Do you see selfishness, self-importance,
self-betrayal, self-intoxication, self-hatred,
self-denigration, self-doubt, self-neglect, self-absorption,
self-contradiction, self-condemnation, self-destruction? Or do
you see self-determination, self-esteem, self-love, self-worth,
self-discipline, self-control, self-expression,
self-examination, self-sufficiency, self-expression,
self-reliance, self-motivation, selflessness, self-awareness,
self-appreciation? Again, what are you looking at? Can you
recognize the face of YOU behind the disguise? Grab hold of the
exaggerated horns of complicated self-deception and wrestle
with it until you are freed from its unnatural and inconvenient
possession. Stop hiding behind the phony role of victim,
savior, saint, or martyr. How devastatingly tiring it is for
you to believe you need for your actions to be seen as “good”,
reliable, trustworthy, considerate and caring. Ha! You are
concerned with nothing except how to survive, thrive and
succeed. No need to continue with that senseless charade. Free
yourself, as well as the others in your life from having to be
grateful and appreciative. You are what you are and feel what
you feel, period. You are irretrievably created for blissful
intent. Undiminished pleasure free-flowing naturally.

The walls of your own self-deluded prison crumble automatically
when you set the other free from any sense of obligation,
responsibility, and duty on your behalf. Face it. What have you
ever done for another that you truly didn’t want to do? And, IF
you did undertake any preconditioned motion of activity, or
restatement of a fortuitous gesture, then ‘you got your reward’
immediately. Stop complaining, moaning and groaning. Nothing
goes unrewarded, ever. What do I hear you saying? “How about
the one you loved who didn’t love you back?” Impossible. Do you
really call what you embraced LOVE? Ha. Mere bondage. IF you
are/were aware and recording/recorded [measured} what was done
or not done in the relationship, no love present. When LOVE is
present there is no consciousness of what the other is
contributing. LOVE, like Grace, is sufficient thereof. IF there
is a moment of looking back in your life with your replying,
“After all I did” …rest assured, the luring self-gratifying
martyred incentive was compensated. Take another look in the
‘mirror of yourself ‘reflected in the other presently? Do you
see happiness, contentment, appreciation of the smallest
insignificant things? Or do you see and hear bitching, griping,
complaining and constant bad-mouthing?

You are continuously surrounded by clues to the approaching
cycles and patterns in your life. You are never unaware of what
you think are doing but you are in actuality never doing what
you think. If at any moment, You THINK you KNOW what you are
doing, cease immediately. {IF not, All well and good. Enjoy the
roller coaster ride you are inevitably setting up!} You are at
THAT point the most deeply embedded in self-trickery. The fact
that you were imbued with unceasingly sacred artistic, musical,
dramatic talent goes without saying. You were also given a
‘Blank Canvas’ upon which you can paint your responses to the
unalterable creative experiences you will no doubt encounter.
Your life of ‘pain and joy’ is filled with a rainbow of
conjugated color. Therein exhibits your artistic pursuit and
purpose. Decide what masterpiece you will endeavor to create.
Express yourself thoroughly, naturally and conveniently always
without restriction. Paint the picture of ‘Savory Night’ of
delight without apology. Enough, already; shock yourself. Do
something blatantly meaningful and shameless to you.

Proud Native {Born, Bred, and Resident} of North Carolina,
married 39 spectacular years, 6 children, 11 grandchildren.

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